Asking a Sibling for Help

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Unfortunately, no matter how politely you ask, the person you are asking for help may not immediately say “yes”. But don’t give up. This is the time to draw on your listening skills. The person you are talking to may have problems with the details of your suggestion or strong emotions about taking on additional responsibilities. The best antidote is to listen, acknowledge his or her feelings and be non-judgmental.

You do not have to agree with what your counterpart says, but he or she will be less likely to feel that you are an adversary if you let him or her know that you understand the issues at hand. Try to stay away from comparing which of you is currently more overwhelmed. A conversation that starts down that path does not usually go anywhere constructive. By being non-judgmental and acknowledging your counterpart’s feelings, however, you are letting him or her know that you are an ally, and that you are in this together. Your compassion for his or her situation makes it more likely that he or she will feel compassion for you.

When dealing with a sibling remember to listen and do the following:

• Acknowledge your sibling’s feelings.
• Be non-judgmental.
• Do not get sidetracked.

Seeking help is healthy and is in the best interest of your loved one. Your goal is to give good care, get help and reduce the strain and stress that caregiving is creating in your life. Listening may be hard when you are feeling overwhelmed, but it is the best way to help your family find solutions to the needs of your ail